What’s Monopoly without a few hotels?

Game night in the Tucker home. All of the kids were gathered around the table for a night of Monopoly. Trouble is, my wife doesn’t believe in playing for big money.

She made her way around the board buying exactly one property in each color. “That keeps you from putting hotels on them” she said. It also keeps me from having fun.

We spent the next couple of hours swapping money with each other. “Indiana Avenue!” she would say, “You owe me $14”.

Seconds later the chatter was from me. “Marvin Gardens: you owe me $16”.

It was this way for waaaayyy too long. No one could buy a house or hotel on a property because no one owned more than 2/3rds of the colors. The only one going broke was the bank from us rounding “Go” and collecting $200.

Luckily, Lauren landed on Park Place on her first trip around the board and then promptly rolled “snake eyes” to buy Boardwalk. To expedite the inevitable end of this game, I started rooting for and coaching Lauren on how to manage her property. She started trading in the $200 for passing Go for a new house. Not soon enough, I landed on Boardwalk with 3 hotels and was put out of the game.

My wife is the corner lemonade stand of Monopoly. Never taking in more than $28 from any roll of the dice. Never expanding her empire; content with taking nickels and dimes.

If Lauren hadn’t hit those two properties, we’d still be playing this game Christmas morning. Somebody poke me in the eye with the race car if I ever suggest we play this game again.


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